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How to Put on a Condom

Condoms are pretty easy to use. Good thing, too, because by the time youíre ready to whip them out, you probably wouldnít have the patience for anything too complicated.

Basic tip: have the condom within armís reach. That would be the bedside table, or the glove compartment, or the kitchen draweróhey, wherever makes you happy. It is absolutely crucial that you put in on before any contact between your penis and your partnerís body. Even a little playful rubbing can release fluids with sperm or STD-causing organisms. If she complains that condoms reduce her pleasure, youíre just using the wrong kind. Get something thatís ultra-thin, or ribbed for her pleasure. For kicks, pick one that glows in the dark. Youíve got scented condoms, flavored condoms, condoms that do everything but break into song as you reach your climax. Shop around. Buy whatever you like, just buy one.

And use one. Itís simple, promise. Carefully remove the condom from the packet. Donít tear it, or itís useless. Since air trapped inside it can make it break, squeeze its closed end between your thumb and forefinger before slipping it on your erect penis. Donít let go of the end just yet.

First check if youíve got the right side up. The roll has to be on the outside. Still holding the tip of the condom, use your other hand to unroll it down your penis. Now charge!

While the heat of the moment may make you forget your name, much less the state of your condom, pay attention to whether or not the condom stays in place. Not only would it be extremely unromantic to have to fish for a condom inside your partnerís vagina (this is not what is normally meant by the term ďfingeringĒ) you could leak something. So roll it back if it rolls up. If it comes off completely, you need to use a new one. Like a tire, you should always keep a spare. (Or two, or three, depending on how you want to use the rest of the evening.)

After ejaculation, withdraw even while youíre still erect. Take off the condom only after youíre completely withdrawn. Be very careful about removing it away from your partnerís body.

Never flush the condom down the toilet. And never use it more than once. This is not the time to wax poetic on the importance of recycling. Be hygienic: wrap it in a condom before tossing it into a bin.

So, ready for another round?








 



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